My fictional friend Kenny Oldhead asked if he could make a guest post of his Top 10 Sneakers of 2020 So Far. He’s a typical older sneakerhead who doesn’t pay resell, complains about how the culture is shit now, and bullies people on social media who don’t wear their kicks. Take it away Kenny!

Hey nerds who only think a shoe is good if it resells, press pause on your Discord and eBay pool listings for a second cause here’s a list of the only good sneakers that released this year. Don’t expect any trash Yeezys or ice cream shoes for toddlers. Warning, you can’t wear any of these with your yoga pants.

10. Reebok Shaqnosis

I plan on pulling a quad muscle in these whenever drop-in basketball starts again.

9. Converse Pro Leather

An important shoe because Jordan wore these at UNC and even won the chip in them. Denim stains, here I come.

8. Air Ship

Nike finally retros the Air Ship and makes it impossible to buy for those of us that actually think it’s a nice shoe.

7. AM90 Volt

They finally un-bootified the AM90 AND included the arch supports again. Buy it on sale.

6. Air More Uptempo Olympic

I was wearing these when some kid at Costco said nice kicks to me. I talked about it all day until my wife told me to can it.

5. Lebron 7 Fairfax

An impossible to get PE, finally released as a GR, but no one cares cause it doesn’t resell. A perfect release IMO.

4. BlackCat 4

Thanks for letting it sit so me and my friends from the Y could cop to wear.

3. Kentucky Dunk

This one makes me angry cause it went to all you resellers instead of the people who truly deserve them: those of us who loudly complain about how Dunks and SBs sat and were on sale at one point and can’t believe how high prices are now. We are the true heroes.

2. AJ5 Fire Red

Who renamed this the Fire Red? It was always called the Silver Tongue. They finally got rid of the junk Jumpman and brought back the Nike Air.

1. Flint 13

Cowboys winning the Super Bowl this year.